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The Morning After Pill

August 8, 2010
I had the unfortunate displeasure of watching Kathie Lee Gifford on the later segment of The TODAY Show the other morning as I was getting ready in our hotel room.

I never watch the TODAY show or anything having to do with that annoying woman so I was a little taken aback to see her. Well, actually I heard THAT VOICE. Seriously, why is she still on TV? It must be purely for our entertainment, and not in a good way.
(It pains me to even write her name, so I shall heretofore refer to her as KLG. Hoda is pretty cool though.)
I really have no idea what this particular morning’s show was about (Is it ever about anything? Really?). I just happened to tune in when they had on two guest OB/GYNs. KLG & Hoda were discussing, get this, birth control options.
I thought KLG’s head was going to explode.
The discussion went as such (with a few RachelintheOC flourishes):
OMG—birth control? Cover Kody’s ears! Sex before marriage? NOT MY KODY! I will DIE before that happens. Hurry, Hoda, put those condoms away, KLG hissed. Kody might SEE.

How can people be so CALM about this? asked KLG. The only national emergency I see here is allowing our kids to have sex before marriage. Lock them up! What do you MEAN it’s not a federal crime? she asked Hoda. What kind of country is this?

KLG’s eyes were positively wild with fear. We will not put birth control on TV, NBC. I will quit. Our children cannot know that such things exist, I would bet money she fumed to her producers right before the segment was up. You mean a woman can actually kill a potential LIFE by taking a pill if she thinks she might be pregnant? Well, jeepers, Hoda, I never thought I’d live to see the day. It’s just, just…disgusting is what it is. Look at my face, people. These googly eyes don’t lie.
Honestly, this ridiculously vacuous America’s Sweetheart needs to GO AWAY. Her face was filled with such rage and disapproval over the topic of birth control for our “children.” You could just feel the anger she felt at the betrayal of her religious beliefs being splashed all over national television. How dare their guests mention (gasp!) condoms and emergency birth control for our (slaps cheeks) little babies? We must teach abstinence! Or we should expect God’s wrath.
I’m not saying this only because of my personal beliefs. KLG was an embarrassment to the physician guests trying in vain to get a single word in to their special mother and daughter audience (and hello?) national audience as well. The chick just isn’t doing the job the geniuses at NBC are paying her to do. Call me crazy but somehow inserting your religious beliefs and being judgmental over a teenage national health issue (crisis) seems, to me, like she’s not doing her job.
Poor Hoda – I can’t imagine what it’s like to deal with such a politically close-minded woman, daily. Yet people seem to love this inane waste of space. Why?
Do you want to know what bothers me the most? I’ve never been a fan of hers; I can say that with all honesty. But I did quasi-respect the success she achieved early on in the typically male-dominated arena of morning news of the early 80s. She successfully parlayed that exposure into several admittedly tacky affordable clothing lines of dubious origin, various and sundry gaudy jewelry lines, as well as a questionable singing and acting career. While any shred of respect I had for her was pretty much slim, she made it was easy to go to none from there. (And don’t even get me started on the plastic surgery. Oy.)
So, where does that leave me and KLG? Well, you can be sure I won’t be tuning in to watch her–not that I ever did before. But I damn sure won’t ever tune in again.
Even if I just want to watch her head explode.
  1. I've never seen the Today show but you can probably sit comfortably secure in the knowledge that one day, Cody will grow up and do things to upset and embarrass her in front of the nation, and then write a book about it. Most likely, she will become a recluse and die alone.

  2. Anonymous permalink

    So true, MrsWhich, so true!!! She belongs with the puritans in England in 1600. Ba-Bye….klg

  3. Everything about that show make my head hurt. Except when they drink. I condone morning drinking.

  4. I've never once watched her on TV and not wanted to throw up. I'm still unclear on why NBC chose her co-host with Hoda, or how Hoda (who started out as an actual journalist) tolerates her.

  5. I have no idea what show you are talking about (or who Hoda is?) but I had a great time reading your entry anyway and especially liked MrsWhich's comment. LOL.

  6. Have you ever watched the SNL skit where they make fun of this show? The chick that plays KLG is hysterical and when we actually saw the real show the skit was scarily accurate!

  7. Starry_girl permalink

    Fingernails on a chalkboard sounds better than KLG.

  8. Oy vey…KLG is so out of touch. As for TV ads for big pharma–if KLG wants to ban birth control ads, then let's ban ALL big pharma ads–including–GASP! VIAGRA.

    I think the only reason KLG has a job is because she's got pictures of some NBC exec diddling a child or something.

  9. Streetlights94 permalink

    Can't stand the woman. But I think the larger issue here is this: what happened to we, the viewers, being able to turn to such a forum and being able to receive information in an unbiased format? Regardless of show's hosts' personal biases? If these hosts invites people onto the show in order to present information, in this case birth control, then it is the hosts' responsibility to ensure the information will be presented in manner that will best reach the audience. And not let personal views interfere, no matter what side of the political spectrum those views might reside. To not be able to do so is completely insulting to the guest, the viewer, and the profession. It is unprofessional at best, immature at worst. We all deserve better.

  10. Someday, I will admit to you the reaction of me, buying condoms to put in my late teenagers bathroom. And not just the kids who said “You did what?!” but parents who thought I was corrupting kids who would *never* other wise think of doing — what we did!! LOL … I am so glad her Kody is smarter and would never … LOL

    Jacqui Jacoby
    Twitter: JaxJacoby

  11. she does have limitations and they will not help her parent.

    breathe Rachel, breathe… 😉

  12. I love all these comments. I struggled a bit writing this, to be quite honest. As a woman, I don't like critcizing other women, especially if they've opened doors for us in some way, which she did (early in her career on the morning news).

    However. She is being paid to do a job, regardless of her gender. And that's where she's failing miserably.

    So I decided it was okay to put her on my skewer. She clearly deserves it.

  13. KLG reminds me of Kathy Griffen. Neither of them are easy to watch or listen to. Just plain annoying.

  14. Them's fighting words, Fickle Nickle :). I actually love Kathy Griffin, though I understand that she rubs people the wrong way. Personally, I think she's hilarious and I enjoy her sarcasm. Hmmm, I can't imagine why. (Oh, and the color of her hair.)

    Funny that you brought her up. I have a blog post ready to go about her and Joan Rivers, two of my comedy idols–though both are considered polarizing forces in comedy.

    Should be a lively discussion.

  15. Kathie Lee drives me batty. That's all.

  16. I love Kathy Griffin! I try to be witty and funny and mean – just like Kathy!
    Why are YOU watching The Today show? Blech, patu,tu,tuey. Ick.
    So, sister… and yes for all of you reading… she's my sister… repeat after me… I AM IN CONTROL, I CAN CHANGE THE CHANNEL, I CAN TURN THE TV OFF. I HAVE CHOICE.
    Feel better at all?
    Seriously though – loved the post. xoxoxoC

  17. It is amazing that in this day that they would let someone like KLG on T.V. MrsWhich said it for me.

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